Being present. If I’m honest it sounds way easier than it actually is, at least for me.
Any time I know that I am coming to the end of something whether it is school, a job, where I’m living, or a group or church I’ve been a part of, I always want to end well. I want to still give my all knowing that I was there for a reason, knowing I want to pass things off or come to the end of seasons well.
Usually, however, if one season is ending then another one is beginning. A new job, a new place to live, a new church to be a part of. And it’s hard to not start wondering what it’s going to be like, hoping that it will be better than where I’ve come from. And usually there are logistics that go along with it, paperwork that needs to be signed, housing needs to be found, and just thinking through scenarios for this next season.
I am currently in that place, and have been for a couple weeks now. I am writing this as I’m flying home from Puerto Rico. I haven’t been home in months and I’m so excited to be there and to get to sleep in my own bed! Going home also means the end of my time in Puerto Rico, and the beginning of a new season.
Not only am I going back to Columbia, but Chloë is moving here as well and we have another friend, Kyria, who is also moving. So there has been planning and prepping for that, looking at houses, deciding the best part of town to live in, thinking about cooking since I don’t eat meat and they do, how we’ll decorate, and the list could go on. And as I’m thinking through all that, I have been starting to job hunt. My time ending in PR means there could be a season of unemployment. So I have been praying and looking for jobs. Thankfully those prayers have been answered and I found out Tuesday that I landed a job within the same organization I have been working with for the last few months!
But as all that had been going on in my head, I was still on this beautiful island, leading a team, helping run operations for 60+ people. I wanted to end well, I prayed about ending well, but felt like there was something in the future that kept pulling me toward it. Some days it was almost a fight to be present, especially if I had a little down time.
I think there’s a lot to learn and so many ways to see Jesus when we’re present. I believe I ended well, I know I gave it my all, and am so grateful for the time I had helping the survivors of Hurricane Maria.
Some of the looking ahead is because of excitement, but some of it is lack of trust and trying to plan it all out. No matter where you are today I encourage you to join me in being fully present right where you are! We never know what Jesus could be trying to show us if we’re always looking ahead.